An interview with the Captain, one man army, a retard.

1.WARNING: Graphic content. Staring at the image below for more than 3 sec(s) can cause serious mental illness. I DID warn you.

2.EXTRA NOTE: Dont bother reading if you dont appear to be an Indian whos familiar with Action Packed *vomits* Tamil movies. Really.

Technical Diagram; Subject01 : Captain Vijayacunt Vijayakanth.

1. Bloodshot eyes : Effective to scare anyone away, including midget pornstars and cars would stop thinking its a new traffic light in town.
2. Boomerang eyebrows : Effective to kill rodents and newborn baby swines.
   
3. Bear pubic hair like moustache : The manly charm, attracts most hairy Indian gay men.
   
4. Perfect complexion : Dual 5K layer coloring, sometimes brown, sometimes pink. Pearl silver coated.
5. Somewhat thick dark hair : Perfect.

This dude is a living disaster, im speechless. My blog's representative Codename: 'Dood' managed to spend a quality moment with this living legend. Here's the interview :-

Dood : A very good evening sar!
Captain : Call me captain, yes good evening indeed.

Dood : You look pretty tired, been a busy day eh captain?
Captain : Oh yes, tell me about it, was working out for a staggering 3 minutes, thats how i keep fit nowadays. *wipes sweat off face*

Dood : First things first, why are you called captain? I cant imagine you as captain of anything, where the name came from? Why 'captain'
Captain: Very good question, back in school, yes i did study, hehe. Oh yeah, back in school i wasnt a very good looking boy, i know my fans beg to differ, but i have to be modest, and yeah so i wasnt a bright student as well, so i picked an activity, Cheerleading since i was a faggot, still am up to a certain extend, so the girls were all happy to see a moustached faggot cheering along with them and made me the captain. I still remember the day i walked out as a captain for the little ladies. It was beautiful and i wept that evening.

Dood: Goodlord, that's beautiful. *holds puke* Uhm..how old are you captain?
Captain: *blushes* Im 25 this year, i know i look like shit older, its genetics. And the brave moustache adds a year or two.

Dood: Err, but you've been around the industry for 25 years now. And youre only 25?
Captain: Shadap, next question. (=^_^=)

Dood : How do you explain yourself going against the Newton law of gravity, captain?
Captain: Well, If object A has mass Ma and object B has mass Mb,
then the force F on object A is directed toward object B
and has magnitude of

F = G Ma Mb / r2 hence G x cunt Im a DuMB f.uck /4t = iM tHE 3 Man. (=^_^=)

Dood: Fuc...*sigh*. Whatever.
Captain : /me shy.

Dood: Are you married captain?
Captain: Ow come on, im still young, and im in the midst of looking for my dream camel girl. I have got only one condition for her though, she has to be as retarded hairy as me, at least by 78% then I would consider her as my better half.

Dood: How do you end up with gorgeous babes in movies, babes like Isha Kopiko Gophikar and Simran.
Captain: Hahaha, well its not my ever handsome looks definitely, i suppose its the charm i have, it works all the time, ow and not forgetting my ultimate smile which is only 40% visible under my manly belly moustache. Some even went to the extend of begging me for a duet bit in the movie. I turned them all down. My chicks has got to have some quality, like... being really hairy.

Dood: *mumbles - wutta fucktard* Haha, thats really interesting dumbass captain. So what do you do when on your freetime?
Captain: I watch my little goats taking dump, playing hide and seek with my maids, shaping my moustache, admiring myself in front on the mirror, milking camels, and watching random animal sex on Discovery, sometimes i workout 3 times a day, 3 long minutes per session, you might be wondering where the muscles came from, well this is it. Workouts, and im persistent.

Dood: Yeah, workout eh?
Captain: /me shy again.

Dood: How can you dance so well, are you naturally gifted?
Captain: Ow haha. Thanks, i know im a great dancer, some say it looks like a bag of rice jumping from a truck, but i know myself better. Well dance, let me see..i took dancing lessons personally from MJ and i later on taught Prabudeva and brothers.

Dood: Ever thought of WWF'ing?
Captain : You mean replacing the mascot Panda?
Dood : No dumbass, the World Wresting Federation.
Captain: Ow..hehe..not at the moment, i dont dare baring my body much since i came from an orthodox family. Fighting on stage with my underwear would make women go hoo haa over me. I dont want that. Really.

Dood: Yeah yeah fuck off. I gotta run, thanks for the time, bitch.
Captain : Jai Hind.

End.


Hopefully no ones hurt. Out!

p/s: Wont be blogging for a couple of days because i'll be off to Penang. Might blog some shit bout Penang though. Thanks for reading :)