Only In Penang

WARNING: Random discrimination, if youre from Penang and youre retarded, dont bother reading.Well...on second thought, go ahead and read it, youre retarded anyway.

Monkey, yaay!

I was in Penang a couple of week back, for the labour day holiday, it was just a day extra, which didnt do any good. Anyway Penang, weird ass island, populated by more monkeys than human beings, humans there are like fucking monkeys anyway. I have a confession though, i was born in Penang, stayed there a couple of months when i was a baby, that was it, i was sane enough to get the fuck outta the place. Call me a hypocrite, i dont care.

If you're wondering whats so bad about living in the self proclaimed beautiful island, click here and see what it can do to you, considering if you've been living in Penang for all your life. This can get worse. Bwahaha, sue me Deena.

The place is allright, its good if you wanna dump all your work and chill for a couple of days, Penang would be ideal, yes...because you can laugh at almost everything there, its all stupid for no apparent reason, here's some stuff that you can see/feel/hear/eat/experince /whatsofuckinever only in Penang :-

• Driving is madness, i drove for 2 days and i felt like giving up drinking driving altogether, you can get your poor self into accident if you abandon your concentration for mere 0.3 sec(s). You will listen horns like everywhere for no reason, its like they just found out what horns in cars are, to honk and annoy the crap out of you. Well what happened was, i was driving on my lane, some Chinese old bugger on the opposite direction riding his bike towards me, on my lane, and guess what, motherfucker honked at me. Brilliant fucktard. I wonder what his mom fed him, prolly some pearls and mule shit.
• Botanical Garden - There's nothing botanical about this place, just a bunch of peanut-stealing, small-children-scaring, upskirt-fetishist, immigrant-molesting monkeys. No, not humans, real monkeys, yes. These monkeys are wicked, they will annoy the breakfast out of you. Count a couple of gay Banglas in. They enjoy gay love in Botanical Garden maybe because they have deep penetration connection with the subhuman primates.
  
• There are more horses than indians dogs in Batu Feringghi beach.
  
• Sleeping Buddha - allright, we get it, he's Buddha and he's sleeping, whats the big fuckin deal about it, everyone sleeps, even rodents.
• Weird sight, things that you can actually encounter on the roads when youre driving
  
  1. Pasembor bike(some modifed bike, looks half bike, half dining table) overtaking your car on traffic jams. Wow!
  2. Beca - its everywhere in the city, small children from KL would go like "Daddy daddy, what the fuck is that?" when they see one.
  3. More bicycles than motorcyles, and yeah they have buses without air condition still.
  4. No one gives a damn about wonderbra zebra crossing.
• Nasi lemak with fish, its weird, really, its not ikan bilis, and its not a fully grown fish, its like some teenage fish or ,maybe the retarded ones. Wait..i get it, its a midget fish. Only in Penang.
• Rojak is pasembor, cibai cabai is chilli, nyiur is coconut and they still use the term kupang, and some poor KL mothefucker gonna get confused like shit.
• One and only 'happening' (according to them) club is called Slippery Shithole Senorita. Apparently everyone goes there.
• Food is cheap, yes, but the portions are much more smaller, even a midget might need to double the order. So pratically its not that cheap. What a bunch of lying fuckholes.
• My dad bought drink for like 13 of us, drinks like soya bean and stuff, guess how much was it, RM 3.00, dirt cheap, yes, but the stuff is good.
• Nasi Kandar, i have to admit its really good here, but trick of nasi kandar is just the rice is salted slightly, that gives it the extra taste.
  
• Some of them are really stupid, you can actually skip the Penang bridge toll and get in for free. Allright, just kidding.

KL is not that great afterall, I live in Shah Alam, and you know what kinda shithole place is that, if you know what i mean. But seriously, i love to be in Penang, just for a week, not more than that, prolly because its so much different from KL, the lifestyle is on a much more slower pace, not the fucking cars there though. Its a great place to relax, and enjoy your holidays, and pig out at the nearest nasi kandar restaurant.

Old buildings in Penang are really beautiful, great B&W photography subject, me likes.

Although Penang is a little retarded with a tint of weirdness, but its truly beautiful. Hypocrite? Uhm..

Out!

No monkeys were harmed during the vacation period.